Commiserate with Jon and Kate plus 8

(Going way out here...this is NOT typical commentary for me)



I’m not much into reality shows but I admit to watching Jon & Kate Plus 8 on occasion over the past year or so. I, like so many other fans, got caught up in the fascination of raising so many children while apparently maintaining order and sanity for the most part within the family structure. Perhaps my special education background and experiences in working with families and young children drew me further into the show as I watched the dynamics of the parents dealing with day to day issues-jobs, schedules, multiple children with multiple wants and needs, etc. I also was captivated by the beautiful children, watching their growth and interactions as they explore and develop into little individuals. But one thing I never personally saw was a relationship between the parents, with the exception of those times when they were “planning for the kids” or “doing for the kids”. I do not recall (and admit it may have been present in episodes that I haven’t seen), actually seeing Jon & Kate spend any quality time alone or in discussion (and granted that may be none of my business as well and maybe it was planned that way). But I would have enjoyed and felt it to be more “reality” if Jon & Kate had perhaps sat down and talked to each other, really talked. Not intimate details of course, and not the producer stimulated discussions on the chair, but just talked to each other. Perhaps that is something that lacks in a lot of “real” relationships as well-the “just talking” part.

The entire situation is sad. I want to attempt to avoid judgment in any way because…there are only two people who know the true reality and that of course is Jon and Kate. The media, relatives, friends, and others like me can speculate all we want about the situation, but they are the only two who know the truth and bear the responsibility. It has been their choices, their lives, and their children. They’ve just allowed us viewers to be visual participants of certain parts of their lives.

Naturally the concern is for the children first and foremost. They are adorable and so filled with energy-hopefully the divorce, separations, and family changes will have minimal effects. I hope counseling is a part of the healing process for ALL concerned and that includes both parents and any others they choose to bring around their children. I am unaware if Jon & Kate sought counseling before coming to their decisions, which I hope they would have, but again it can be a private matter. It might have been beneficial to their audience to learn that they did try counseling first though, since it is a show based in reality and produced by TLC, which is/should be promoting learning and growth for its viewers. The Learning Channel is a channel to turn to, to learn, right? Why not help people learn to try to deal and cope instead of just giving up. (I’m not saying that Jon & Kate just gave up.)

I also hope that if either parent chooses to enter into another relationship at this time he/she does so with extreme caution. There can be many false “loves” waiting in the wings-face it there’s a lot of publicity and money involved in this family and there are many star struck individuals who might seek involvement just to be a part of it. I hope neither parent falls prey to insincerity on the part of a future partner. Proceed with caution. Perhaps, in my humble opinion, waiting for all to adjust to life changes before getting involved may be a better choice. But as I said…it is their choice and one they and their children will have to live with in the future.

I feel sad for the children who may experience the loss and separation that divorce often brings, but hope that Jon & Kate will continue to keep those beautiful children as the main focus of their lives. I empathize with Jon to a point, as some times he did seem to be beaten down (but he too could have spoken up as he readily admitted). Marriage is a commitment and one that takes two-if you’re unhappy it’s up to you to let your partner know, not seek solace elsewhere. And yes I feel for Kate- for the maternal part and as a woman who must be agonizing over the situations-worrying about the children, concern for her “singleness” and aloneness in raising her family, and yes perhaps the feeling of failure. She too readily acknowledged she was tough on Jon and I have to admit to cringing some times during the show, but again perhaps THAT would have been a great learning experience. How about when Kate was demanding or commanding Jon during an episode, he ever so calmly turned to her and said, “Kate, I don’t appreciate how you are talking to me, especially in front of the children. I need a minute.” (He leaves and then comes back in and asks), “now what is it I can do.” Now there’s a learning experience! But truthfully, can any of us do this in the heat of the moment-I’d like to think so, with focus and determination.

The reality is apparently as stated by Jon & Kate, their marriage is over. I would hope one day they might reconcile because I do believe they started a beautiful ideal with their large family. But if they cannot get back together at some point, I hope they continue to focus on their children, and one day find peace and happiness in their own hearts for themselves. They were blessed with an abundance of little ones and I hope their lives continue to be a blessing to those children-it is all that matters.

Tryin' to go green...

I've decided to make more of an effort to "go green" as they say. We have done the basic recycling for many years and I've always felt good about that, but I am learning about so many other ways to conserve and protect our earth, and use natural resources.



The first thing I did to avoid as much chemicals in food as possible is join a local organic farm a.k.a a CSA (Community Supported Agriculture). We met the owners of this particular farm two years ago at a local farmer's market. At that time I was trying to convince my husband we needed to eat more organic foods. So once we learned this gentleman's farming methods and beliefs (and met many members of his wonderful family), we decided to join for this current growing season. The season has just started and we picked up our first "fruits" last week. Mmmmm....fresh lettuce and radishes were our choices.

Also, I decided that I myself wanted to try my own raised bed garden. So I planted different lettuces, onions, radishes, rhubarb, strawberries, beans, peas, tomatoes, peppers, garlic, eggplant, zucchini, squash, and would you believe I still have room? My mother was right...nothing tastes better than something you've grown yourself. I'm amazed I've been so successful with it thus far. And boy do I LOVE walking up to the back yard and harvesting for dinner-can't get any fresher!

I also began bin composting earlier this year. I attended a local seminar and learned a lot about it-more than I ever thought was involved. I also purchased a kitchen compost container to collect the compost goodies and transport to the larger bin. I do have a problem keeping it as moist as it should be so I need to be more vigilant with adding water.

In addition to the "food" scraps compost, I also started a yard waste compost pile. I did purchase a cage like bin for this but it is not as sturdy and durable was advertised, so I ended up using other fasteners to keep it together. I will look to getting something different going for next year, but for right now I at least have it functioning.

Oh my gosh I almost forgot our newest composter-The Pet Poo Composter! What a hoot! I'm not kidding-this is actually a system that converts your pet's poo into viable compost-no sh*t! (pun intended) I just set it up so I'll have to see how it goes (no pun intended). But with multiple pets it seemed like a great way to use something that is such a "hot commodity" around here. It was pretty gross putting the worms in the composter though-ick! I'm not that earthy. I'll let you know!

I purchased rain barrels to collect nature's water for gardens, etc. I haven't set them up yet though as we are having some work completed at our house and they would be in the way, so I have to wait a bit for set-up.

Now here's a biggy, for me any way...light bulbs! I am gradually working to change all bulbs to the energy efficient ones. In time..

Our washer and dryer are newer and both carry the energy symbol as does our dish washer, so as appliances break down, hopefully we will be able to continue purchasing "green/energy efficient products."

There are other smaller ways we are trying to conserve but those are the big ones here and I am very proud we are on our way to "Green land." It's very interesting discovering more ways to conserve and save and I'm always looking for new ideas. I hope you all may consider "green efforts" as well-we need to take care of God's earth and it can start with each one of us! Enjoy the beauty of today!

Okay...where's summer?

This isn't funny any more nor is it the way it is supposed to be-70 degree weather? In June? Seriously! Not to mention that it seems like it has been raining for 30 days straight (OK so perhaps a slight exaggeration). Summer is my most favorite time of year (I know many who share that feeling), and it just seems to be taking forever for it to arrive. I mean the pool is ready albeit a tad cool, the garden is growing along with the weeds, the grass continues to need mowing, all the "joys" of summer abound yet...it is a little nippy. Bummer!

I yearn for the ninety degree days, okay well maybe 85. I don't even have a tan line because the sun hasn't been out long enough to create any. Everything is nice and green and full, but it's mostly been enjoyed from the view from the door. Barbecue season has turned to soggy season where the grill remains under cover and the flavors of summer are on hold until the weather breaks. So I am officially putting in my order...WELCOME SUMMER...where are you...your presence is strongly requested-RIGHT HERE!

A Scottie to Love

So often in my writing and conversations I often talk about the "girls"-the Westies. While I always include Trevar in some way, some times it seems he gets a back seat. Well this post is for you Trev....

It is because he IS such a laid back Scottish gentleman that perhaps his personality and antics aren't as pronounced and animated, but he has plenty of talent and humor, AND manners. I refer to his "gentlemanly" manners as the way he always allows the girls to go first-whether we're getting out the car, jumping off the bed, or getting in the car-it seems he always will back off from the more "pushier" females (imagine!) and wait until last. It's kinda' funny to watch.

When going for a walk, the mere mention of the word "walk" brings him running, yet when it is time for a leash he often backs away as the westies twirl and bark. He needs to be coaxed to come forward for his leash. He absolutely loves walks and walks so well on a leash-I don't even know he's there most times. And oh if we get to walk by a wall, he wants up in the worst way! Trevar loves to walk high up on walls, and does it great ease and grace. It's so natural for him.

He likes attention but is never pushy about it like the westies. He has a quiet dignity about himself (like most scotties) and if you watch him you can see he's just waiting to burst with affection and hoping for greetings-so it's always important to remind those who think he "doesn't care" that he really does care. Like a lot of scotties, he doesn't care to be held, but will jump up on a lap, or snuggle closely beside you or at your feet, but it is usually on his terms.

Trevar loves to watch for the groundhog family in the back yard and actually shivers with excitement. He knows basic obedience and many many tricks and directions. The greatest of all are the those he invented himself. One is he'll jump almost on your shoulders if you're seated in front of him, and the other is he'll jump on your back if you happen to bend over in front of him. And the best-the all powerful head butt! If he's really happy and excited he'll press his head against you and dig-it's a real hoot! And any time a box comes into the house...well as you can see by the picture...

He is just an all around good boy. He likes everyone and everything and nothing really frazzles him. He LOVES food and can barely wait for meals or treats to handed out. He still learns new tricks and demonstrates his scottie pride at his accomplishments. He is a wonderful companion and a real scottie love.

And no...you can't have him.